Scarlet's Poetry Den - CyberSeries - Another Step in the Journey

Scarlet's Poetry Den

"CyberSeries"

Another Step in the Journey

so much stuff
so many things
collected in our years together
crammed into every bit of space we had
till we started to stack vertically
till there was no more room there either
as we pull it all apart to move to our new place
I'm faced with an odd collection of memories
as we try to make a whole brand new start

it's taken days to get this far
so many more days before the job gets done
I pause and survey the ruin
all the mud from outside tracked
into my shiny new house
my hair falling out of the clip in huge chunks
hands blackened by newspaper ink
from the small mountain of early editions
coddling our finest crystal, china and cheap pressed glass
I touch my face and put black streaks
under my eye and down my cheek
I'm not used to being this dirty
especially not this muddy
my son points and laughs like it's a huge joke
that mommies can get filthy too

so many stray glasses left from sets
variously broken and smashed
I lovingly stash our sole remaining brandy glass
with three surviving champagne flutes
from a set we've never used
the Wedgewood tea set with the cracked sugar bowl
all those ridiculously small cups and saucers
mug people like us never bother to use

I stumble across the wedding gifts
we've never unpacked - and won't quite still
because there hasn't been a proper place to put them
and ones we've never used - never will
but I'm afraid to throw out in case of bad luck
then there are the ones I completely forgot about
(just who gave this to us and what am I supposed to do with it?)
I had to overcome my vertigo to climb on the stepstool
to put them all away in the very highest shelves

I had to salvage my daughter's hospital bracelet
from when she was born
it was in an old pencil case of hers
which my son had put into the garbage
I found she'd also taken huge chunks of our photo albums
with pictures of her and all the cards I got to celebrate her birth
in my son's room, in a dark corner of the closet I found
all the sweaty sports and baseball things
that have been fermenting since last spring

then there was the hairpin
from my husband's previous wife
I found in the dresser
it's amazing to think it's been there all this time
like some kind of spy, staring at us
during some of our most intimate moments
and I realize he probably bought
that hideous avocado green blender
I won't leave on the counter
he says he's had "forever" for her
we don't talk about things like "her" anymore
nor the son he's sure is his, now 23 or 24
maybe someday showing up at the door

there's all the boxes we moved last time
and never unpacked - mostly books
boxes and boxes and boxes of books
have taken control of my basement
maybe this time, we really will get them shelves
at least we have room for them now
but I'm too tired to even think about that
for several months or more

so many of the little bits and pieces of our lives
which we try to order
but which we know will never be
and that's just the way it is

Go to:
Next Poem
[Main Page] [The Early Years] [Litany of Scars - Notes to a Missing Lover]
[CyberSeries] [The WomanChild Papers] [Links]

I Am A Proud Member Of:

Phenomenal Women Of The Web

I always like to hear from my visitors.
Please e-mail comments, suggestions or questions to scarletd@poetryden.com.